Haha! so, To begin w/, I'll talk about FORWARD CONFERENCE 2010!
FORWARD!!
So, this wasn't your average church trip son.. I was going with the Cornerstone youth, called Now Ministries, from Dothan, AL. I had never met anybody from there and was pretty excited =] Anyway, we left the church on Thursday afternoon to go see huge Christian bands!!
SO!! I went with a non-denominational church which is WAY different than a Baptist church BY FAR! So, just to tell you, every night I went to the concerts I knew I was worshiping God. I just felt God in that place!
The MAIN thing I REALLY want to talk about was the time I spent with the people from church. Everybody that went was full of the love of God and it just showed. I love Now Ministry and the people there. That whole week just really prepared me for what you're about to hear about. =]]
Okay, so this part is VERY personal to me and my relationship with God. If you're going to judge me for this, don't read.
On June 27 at 12:50 in the morning, I was filled with the Holy Spirit. If you don't know what that means, you need to speak with somebody wiser because I'm not here to give you the Spirit, nobody can, only God can. I was in Atlanta at the Homewood Suites in a hotel room with the leaders of Now Ministry and some of my closest friends that I've met on that trip. I had a hard time believing what they were trying to tell me because I was raised Baptist and I've never heard of being filled. I've never believed in speaking in tongues or prophesying or any other gift of the Spirit truly. But, when I was in that room, The people that helped me could back EVERYTHING up with scripture! That really spoke to me that this was true and that I could and should do it! I took a step of faith. One of the hardest things in my life at that moment, but once I acted on it, God took care of the rest for me =D
I'm going to tell you the truth now. I know how to speak to God through the Spirit in prayer and I've seen God's love for me more than I ever have. The experience was spectacular the first time I spoke in the Spirit. I was in the room with about 7 other people and we were just talking about what was going on in our lives. The wife of the youth pastor called me out and said she just knew I had something to say, so she told me to share. I told her that the whole atmosphere of this place was full of God's love and I would probly never be the same (which I haven't) and that I haven't felt love from friends like this in a long time. But after I shared, one of the coolest dudes I've probably ever met asked her what being filled was like and how to speak in tongues. He opened the floor to discussion of something REALLY amazing. Anyway, the wife told us all about the Spirit and being filled. She told us about a book she was reading that helped her to understand Him better, and how to be filled and what happens when you are filled. You see, I thought you would become like possessed and crap, haha-but no-You're in your right mind and you have God in you through His Spirit!!!
YOU BECOME CLOSER TO HIM. :]
I was skeptic of it at first, I was crying in hysteria of what I didn't know. I asked if I could watch everybody else that wasn't filled yet and wanted to be act upon it. I was REALLY scared and confused. I went to the bathroom and started crying horribly!! God was acting upon me, He was showing me His love, and He told me to do this. I gathered myself together and went out there and watched everybody get filled first. They all started to pray to God, worshiping Him and praying to Him. Praying in the Spirit. It was an AMAZING experience to watch and was so intimate between all of us. I finally accepted what I was called to do. I went to the bathroom one more time and tried to pull myself together. That awesome friend I talked about that brought up the topic came in there and kind of gave me a "pep-talk". He was so nice to me, I felt like I had a real friend for the first time since I moved down here. Nobody's ever spoke to me like that, I knew God was speaking through him. God was telling me that everything was going to be okay and that this is something He wants me to do! I've had experiences where God has talked to me through other people, but this was from a peer!! It was amazing :] God was telling me that He loved me through it all. I was truly loved that night. I went out into the room, after I cleaned my face of course, and I asked that everybody would pray for me before being filled. They did, and we went over how to do things. Of course none of this made sense still. But God is called the Comforter and The Source of Understanding. In fact, He gave me the understanding! I prayed the prayer for the Spirit, and then we all started to praise God in prayer. People were speaking in tongues and lifting His name! I started to mumble words. I admit, I was weak at this... Then I felt God the Spirit take over. He was directing what words to say and how to say them. I was speaking in tongues!!! I was still in my right mind like everybody said, but I was having a conversation with God!!! I had truly taken an act of faith, besides my salvation through my savior Jesus Christ. God had somehow calmed my soul and I felt complete and that God was going to be with me always. I can't run away anymore =]
Just a follow up!!
From that night on, and its been a couple weeks, I've prayed in the Spirit EVERY night since (NO LIE). People notice something different in my life, and learning about God comes easily! I pray in the Spirit and its not just mumbling anymore, He has given me language to praise Him. You see, being filled isn't just about speaking in tongues! Its being closer to Him. I'm understanding what I'm praying for and I totally trust in Him MUCH more than I did before. I've studied His word and I've been given so much insight on what He tells me. I understand more about His Spirit. I've got much more to learn still but I know He's always going to be there. =]
This is basically all I have to say about what happened at Forward. I feel complete and that I don't have to work to be close to God anymore, it all comes naturally now! I love Now Ministries, and I love all the loving people that go there. It feels right. Thank-you to whoever reads this. Don't allow me to sway your faith though, when the moment comes to act on faith, God will make everything clear.
Your Brother In Christ,
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